The best things in life are free.............

Hello again,



autys Dad here again. This week has reaffirmed my belief that in autism world, the simpler the task/event, the more enjoyable for all concerned. Finally the sun was shining and we had some quality time in the garden and local parks playing football, on the swings etc. Trying to go to a family day out place like Sea World or Tower of London would have been a nightmare. We have tried before and the noise, crowds, walking, heat, are all factors that create stress. This leads to screaming, kicking, flapping and other traits. The summer holidays are upon us and I know that everyday would be perfect for auty if we just did the local park, threw in (not up ;-)) a McDonalds, maybe chance going to the local swimming pool and then some play at home. We have thought about a week away in Spain or Portugal but for him, it would be more an endurance to begin with rather than fun.

Sometimes it seems we take a step forwards and two steps back. Last night was a heart breaker for me as I had noticed my autys fascination for turning on and off the washing machine. Last night went a stage further when he sat down in front of it, whilst it was on, and watched the washing going around and around for twenty minutes. His face was very close to the washing machine glass door and he was fascinated by the spinning clothes. He was enjoying it and I tried to move hm away with other more normal treats but he was hooked. This obviously not normal behaviour rammed home again just how "special" he is.

Summer holidays time now and the sun is out.

Have a good weekend
Dad of auty.

Rain Mans revenge!!!!

Good afternoon,

just found out that Rain Man is coming to the West End starring Josh Harnett. I think this is bad news for anyone in the autistic community. My reasoning's are that many peoples perception of autism is based purely on the RM film. So many people have asked me what my little autys "special gift" is? Some are genuinely disappointed when I say he can stare at doors for hours or has a knack for screaming for no apparent reason in aisle three of Tescos. The response is always the same and along the lines of......"you watch, he will be a concert violinist or will be able to draw places he has never even seen, in minute detail". At that point, I absolutely hate Dustin Hoffman!!!! If you have seen the movie do you agree with me? Its all about education I know.

Anyway, my little auty is still doing the usual stuff. This involves the door phenomenon, watching certain parts of a DVD over and over and over and over......you get the message. Amazingly the Night Garden has been consigned to yesterdays DVDs and Balamory has roared back to number 1 spot!!! Now, he loves to dance and if the characters are dancing then its pure magic. Just a hint of music and he will be up and swaying and encouraging others to do so too!!! Its great to watch and his enthusiasm is infectious! Maybe he will be a gifted dancer and you can keep your Nureyev's and Travolta's. Heh heh. Ok, back off my Rain Man soap box. ;-)

He is doing great at his special school but its heartbreaking to not be able to ask how his day was, what was his best part of the day, did you have fun at playtime, etc etc. We get the usual school reports and pray we have some progress. We can see it of course in small ways such as counting to ten, a kind of ABC and some singing. I am being generalistic of course. We know he has had a stressful day though as he will come home and generally protest by doing a poo on the floor or in his pants. His demeanour has not changed enough so we can not see it coming. Maybe its just something that he stores away until he needs a release? Who knows. I wish I did!!!!!

One great thing that he has finally learnt is that when he is out with an adult, he must hold hands. This has been so tough in the past he has been known to just run off, with no awareness for personal safety. His desire for seeking the next door that opens automatically would drive him to run off. Many dirty looks followed from other parents in the street if I have had to forcibly hold his hand for his own safety.

One plus point about my auty is that he knows when he is tired and generally doesn't put up a fight at bedtime. Some of my friends with autys say bedtime is something they have no control of at all. For us, he is generally asleep by 7.30pm. Then we know he will be up usually 5.30-6am but you cant have it both ways.

Have a great week. Praying for sun at the weekend so we can go swimming, have a BBQ and maybe even a cheeky glass of wine.

Take care.
Dad of Auty.

Bupa 10km run for NAS

Good morning,

long time no write. Auty is doing great and we have managed to stop the horrendous screeching whenever a car goes past when we are out for a drive. This was done by a lot of patience and basically whenever it happened we stopped the car and had a chat or simply turned around and went home. This was after he knew we were going to a place he wanted to go to i.e. the park, indoor soft play, anywhere with automatic open/shut doors. It took a long time but the reward scenario paid off. Its a kind of Pavlov's dog approach but it has worked.

The fascination with doors//lifts has hit fever pitch. Its taking over wherever we go now as most shops have these. We have tried rewards, shortened and longer periods of time with the doors, not going at all but to no avail. Most habits he has been weaned off or grown out of. We will keep going and I'll let you know how it goes.

This Monday I am running the Bupa 10km for the NAS. Hope to raise a nice amount for them and have a good run too. I hope its not too hot :-)

We are still using a bottle even though he is approaching six years as he simply refuses to drink his special milk from a cup. He would rather go without and he has done too. Water from a cup is fine but not milk. Just another trait I guess but does anyone else still use t a bottle for their little auty?

Have a good day
Autys dad.

I know a song that will get on your nerves, get on your nerves.....

Hello,

dad of Auty here. Just want to see if anyone else has any experience of this (new to me) phenomenon. Basically, when we would go in the car anywhere, auty would be perfectly happy looking out the window and enjoying the changing scenery. Now however, anywhere in a car is a nightmare. Basically, whenever a car passes by, going in the opposite direction we all hear a whooshing kind of noise. However, auty now has a habit that whenever this happens, he will scream or make a loud grunting noise. The scream can be piercing I have no idea where this came from or even that maybe the noise annoys him as his facial expressions don't change. As you can imagine this is horrendous just nipping to the local shops, but a family day out in the car turns into an event from a horror movie.

We are trying to stop this of course by sitting with him and calming him. Also we are trying to enforce returning home when this happens which stops him going to a place he loves. i.e. the park. On a normal child I could see tihis being needed to be done on a couple of occasions before the message got through. I will keep you posted how that goes in auty world.

School is still a fun place to go and thus we aren't getting any issues with going in the mornings. He is wowing the teachers with his football skills as I have mentioned before. He is going to get in the team and I just hope he is facing the right goal when he gets the ball as it will be walloped in any direction he chooses. : - )

Ok, now I am going to sound like I have watched rainman and am the expert on autism however........my son loves animals and in particular stroking or cuddling them. We went to feed the ducks this weekend and after the trauma in the car he became saintly child!!!!! We fed the ducks, sat and watched them after the bread ran out and even wangled some more bread from another family. Home time was an issue as he was desperate to stay and just watch (with occasional reaching out to stroke) the ducks. This is the same with dogs. He loves to cuddle them which can be challenging if its a Rottweiler on heat.!!!!!! Back to the rainman now.......do all auty kids have this bond with animals or am I generalising? I know most kids love animals but to the extent of cuddling them and talking about them for days after??? My other son loves animals but is not infatuated with them to this extent.

Have a good day!!!
Dad of auty

Your beautifull.........

Hello again,



apologies for delay in writing but I had a birthday with a zero on the end!! Anyway, its back to school time and auty appears to be enjoying full-time school. He has been swimming and gone to a local farm too. Now he is getting "homework" which is only listening to a book being read, but he does appear interested.

I have mentioned before that his piercing scream was slowly being eradicated and replaced by a grunting, kind of gurning. This weekend I noticed sometimes that the actual grunting noise had gone but the face pulling was still evident. This is fine at home but when paying for shopping at Tescos it gets a LOT of funny looks. I noticed a couple of people nudging each other as I packed my away my bogof's!! Of course, he is oblivious to it and its perfectly natural. Its just something I have never really associated with autism and havent (yet) thought of a way to try and encourage him not to do it.



One thought is recurring in my mind though I have to say....................................how will all of this turn out when he is older, bigger and stronger. I like to think that we lead him as stress free and organised life as possible but the future is a tough prospect. Will he be able to lead an independent life or will we need to find a home for him when our age becomes a factor and we cant cope? As its many years away, its kind of been unspoken but as I reached a milestone birthday it really hit me. The thought of him without our TLC hurts so much but I cant seem to find a solution thats feasible.

The stronger part really hit home, literally, this weekend. We went to the local park and because of the cold weather, it was empty. After a few goes on the slide, auty came to me and I expected a request for a snack. However, I got a rabbit punch to the crown jewels and doubled over in agony. Auty calmly walked off. Obviously its frustrating when this happens as he rarely smacks me or I can see when it is going to happen and try and calm him. However, nobody else was in the park so their was no invading of his space, no high noise levels from other children or generally any situations I could tell that would cause a reaction. When he is bigger this could be a big issue especially if it isnt me he is smacking.

Have a great week!!!!
Dad of auty.

Back to school.......HOORAYish!!

Hello and a happy new year to everyone!!!



Christmas was fantastic and was dominated by the Upsy Daisy, Iggle Piggle and the Minky Monks. Yes, "In the Night Garden" won hands down. No games, books or puzzles, just the DVDs and on the web. Auty opened one present out of a mountain of presents and then lost interest. It was so sad to see but expected that Christmas means nothing to him and is just another day. One positive is he is getting lots of exercise. This is due to him dancing every time the birds are singing which is ALL the time as he keeps hitting the rewind button. He did show an interest in a Scalextric father Christmas delivered but as soon as the cars crashed at warp speed, he did not have the patience to reset them, or get daddy to do it.



Rest of the holidays were spent mostly at indoor play places due to the cold weather. This brings the usual joys. The main one is that he tends to play in the toddlers area as it has the ball pit and smaller slides. He has no interaction with the kids whilst in their but because of him being bigger than the toddlers he (and me) gets a few stares from the other parents. A couple of mummies have spoken to him about him "not really being allowed" in that bit, but he blanks them as he cant understand. After a while it usually becomes obvious he is no threat and when he starts growling or gurning the mummies usually pick up their precious ones and run for the hills. I have to say I do chuckle when that happens.



School starts again this week and for the first time in a long while, he doesn't appear to have gone backwards. I would love this not just to be because we had a lot of family (stimulation) time over Christmas, but because the pieces are falling into place from all the efforts from us, the school, the council helpers and his shadow have all put in over the years. Usually we have some regression and go back to even less conversation and a little more pointing and grunting. Anyway, this term will see him go full time and a new adventure begins!!



Have a great week and can anyone share the Xmas they had with their little Auty?



Cheers

Dad of Auty.

Jingle bells my arse!!!! : - )

Hello again,

its a wonderful time of year and I absolutely love it. However, in my auty sons world it is no different to any other time. Ok, so its colder and he gets even more attention from family as he is "special". But, he has no interest in mountains of presents, scoffing loads of mince pies or falling asleep drunk in front of the TV. Sorry, the last one is me. : - ) It really is just another day where he needs a routine, knowing what is happening later in the day and a few comfort zone treats to ease any pressure on him.

You may have to bear with me on this but ................................. when a (stereotypical) English person goes abroad and speaks English to Jonny Foreigner which they cant understand, generally the answer is to speak English again but slower and LOUDER!!! I know as I have done it. : - ) Well, as auty son gets to grip with understanding and speaking a few words, people try and engage him in conversation. This invariably leads to him ignoring them and carrying on with whatever he was doing before. Then, the fun begins with the slow and LOUD speaking which is ignored too. This becomes almost gladiatorial with Maximus Shouticus looking for a response from Maximus Autisticus Ignorius. As the volume has gone up a few onlookers are generally staring by now and I have to step in Caesar like with the thumb pointing down.

So far the Christmas tree hasn't been pulled over and the baubles haven't been spun around at the speed of light either. The main fascination is still everything "In the Night Garden". However, we had a IgglePiggle talking, speaking doll but it scared my auty son. In the end he hid it behind the sofa so he could not even see it. He kept shouting "OFF, OFF", whenever anyone went to turn it on. I cant quite work that out even in autism world.

Auty boy has also had a nice dose of flu which does in fact have a plus point!!!! He becomes very tactile and likes to be cuddled, held and snuggles up very close to sleep on my shoulder. As I have said before, grab that piece of sunshine when you can!!!!

If I don't get to post in the coming week, then I wish you all a very merry Christmas and a fantastic 2008!!!!!

Dad of Auty.